POV: you being me being neurotic

what do you say to the cute Bee Person with their Bee Truck who told you to not fear the Bees as you were passing by the other day? you’ve seen the Bee Truck plenty in your neighborhood on little walks here & there & always wondered who owned it, but now you know. & they are super cute. but how to come across as Totally Cool And Zero Percent Creepy?

here are some letters you’ve pondered leaving on their Bee Mobile.

hi Bee Person,

gosh, where to begin? you told me not to…


healing is not Productive™

there are experiences one can go through that will break you. when I say “break” I mean force you to stop in your tracks (maybe to heal, maybe to just Stop) — there’s really nothing inherently broken about this reaction to trauma. it’s entirely normal to shut down as a reaction to trauma despite what we’re told, which is that something as shattering & complex as grief can be overcome with simple chemical combinations, time, or therapy.

don’t get me wrong, I love my chemicals. but the framing of grief as a form of mental illness…


the world is too cruel

Children stand atop rubble after an airstrike in Sanaa, Yemen

since the trial of Derek Chauvin began, the living room has been filled with dying. it’s been brutal to revisit the murder of George Floyd — I use the term “murder” in the reality sense, not the legal sense — but unfortunately I’m no stranger to brutality.

the earliest memories of my childhood are filled with an intense, paralyzing fear of the random, often unprovoked violence doled out by my parents. I grew up in a home dominated by the fear of death due to the fragile state of my prematurely born brother & simultaneously…


They All Do

cw: sexual harassment, sexual assault, Woody Allen

“Being Me Too’d” has been a popular way to describe when the consequences of a boundary crossing man catches up with him. In person (back when that was a thing), I’ve heard TV writers, journalists, actors, and random, boring men say the term as if the side effects of boorish behavior is something that just happens to them unjustly instead of being caused by a series of choices. These poor victims of their own passions!

Pictured: The Real Victim. Attribution: Metropolitan Transportation Authority of the State of New York

I don’t expect decency from politicians, in fact, I expect the opposite. People who need to rule over…


How a Little Experiment Made 2020 Make Sense

Time to get Sappy, y’all. Here’s something I’ve been pondering on since 2016, the worst year of my life until 2017, which was somehow still worse than The Current Hell Year (on a personal level), which still ranks pretty high.

I’m too dumb to be a Real Scientist, but have always challenged myself with personal social experiments. It’s how I test my values or study other people & I’ve done it all my life, from the time I chose to stop shaving at 15, to embracing the uncertainty of the road as a “digital nomad” three years ago. …


Why Can’t I Look Away From this Trainwreck

cw: *A note on my use of the word “Bitch”: this is a reclaimed term I use playfully, sincerely, & ironically all the time. It is context dependent, being more easily understood through inflection. Usage of it in this context is to emulate the language misogynists use against people they deem reckless, messy, & unfit for doling out life advice. I, too, at times myself been a Messy Bitch & make no apologies for it. I use it to draw attention to the problem of calling some people this term while excusing…


Photo by Andrea Piacquadio

first caught sight of one half of ’em maybe six years
or so
ago
five years after I tried smiling more
ten years after everything seemed
scornful

my full of shit detectors
my are you serious
my yes I know more than you about this but it’s not polite to say I guess I’ll let you explain it poorly
it’s not polite to frown with your forehead
either
so a grimace replaces a graceful exit
could never keep my mouth shut while my elevens yelled
either
& I’m the betting type that those words
were wasted

I adore them on…


We Have Learned Nothing

Spoilers ahead, obvs.

Borat disguised pranking a crisis pregnancy center worker. It’s funny because those people are dumb, haha.

I watched Borat 2 so you don’t have to! This whole year has felt like living in a knock-off of the year 2006 and watching this movie was no different. They basically took the same script from the first movie, told the same jokes, and swapped out the people who were being pranked like many sequels do. It all fell very flat and was overall boring as shit. I would say I was disappointed but didn’t have very high hopes to begin with. Some areas of comedy still very much haven’t been updated in 15 years. …


More things you don’t have to say, shouldn’t say, and actually saying out loud diminishes the effect you were probably going for — save yourself now by reading this & Part I. If you have to say it, well, don’t. For the love of all that is holy, good, or pleasant bite that tongue if you feel any iteration of these phrases wiggling out of your mouth hole.

Don’t make me make this face.
  1. “Ally”

This shouldn’t have to be said but it you know it does. Well, maybe not You you, but every one of your (or your only) LGBTQ+ & BIPOC friend/s know it…

MK Lords

writer, talker, modern menace. make contact: https://mklords.com/contact/

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